A Study of Loving Better + 30 Day Challenge FREEBIE!!

Even if they do not believe in God, most people can use 1 Corinthians Chapter 13 verses 4-8 to understand what is expected of us in love.  Not just romantic love, but every kind of love we experience in our lives.  This verse applies not just to a spouse, but to parents, friends, siblings, and fellow humans.

It would be laughable for me to claim that we all get this level of respect and love from even our closest family members.  We have all had hurts, the deepest ones often left by those we love the most.  But we expect this type of love, don’t we?  We expect mothers and fathers to be patient and kind.  We expect our spouses to not want what others have. We get annoyed by boasting, selfishness, anger or constant outbursts from friends, family, and members of the public.

Are we aware that by having that reaction, we are not loving them back?

I want to speak today to everyone, and not just to those of the same faith.  Is love one of your values?  Do you believe in it? If you do, make the study of love a priority.  

How can you LOVE better?

The scriptures above generalize love to many people regardless of beliefs. It’s one we’ve seen too many times nestled amongst the roses at a wedding ceremony. However, when I read this verse, I don't see a marriage, I see something bigger. I see a revolution, an evolution even. I see learning to be better, closer to the Creator of the Universe, and closer to spiritual maturity. This passage represents a feeling of peace and determination, yet a stubborn refusal to give in, no matter what occurs. In the end, what matters most is that we fought in love. That is what will change things, change people along the way, and ultimately, change the world one small act of love at a time.

It’s true.  Love is radical.  It’s God’s essence. (1john 4:8)  I’ve seen it in action and it is AMAZING! 

Love is the patience with which we communicate with someone who isn’t able to see our perspective.  We all have issues with this. We see it everywhere, every day.  Over the last few years, as I have sought to be more aware of how I communicate, the more I have realized that even small conflicts of understanding can lead to outrageous and unnecessary feuds.  Be patient. How we respond is a reflection for everyone around us. 

Love is showing kindness to someone for no reason. 

Giving a stranger a smile.  

Picking a flower for Mom.  

Sharing what we have with others. 

Helping someone simply because they need it.  

Love is doing these things and never bragging about it to our friends or posting a photo on social media. Love is not seeking one’s own righteousness but serving others just for the sake of serving and being happy in doing so.

Love is understanding another person’s life and choices belong to them and are no better or worse than our own. Shame and disrespect have no place in love and certainly not if we use the situation to make ourselves look more holy. We can find this attitude almost anywhere, but especially online. We have all done it, religious or not. There is no shortage of shame thrown at different points of view or lifestyles. Shame changes nothing.

Love is compassionate toward different viewpoints. Different lives, different lenses, but still people with emotions.  Acts of love are done only for the good of all, never for selfish reasons.

Love is scrolling past something that usually offends you and instead of getting offended and letting them know it or even the general “Keep on scrolling”...

Love tries to understand, be compassionate, find a way to serve that person in the right way.  Love isn’t easy. It’s hard. It asks a lot of us. We must sacrifice each day, and no matter how hard we try, we will never get it perfect.  It will, however, change us from the inside out, and inspire others as well

Love relishes in truth.  Truth is a controversial word these days.  In mental health, it’s a very important part of healing.  Finding your own personal truth is huge for someone who has basically been a mimic her whole life. 

“What is your favorite food?”  “How do you like to dress?”  “What do you believe?”

Spiritually, religiously, there are also many “truths”.  Every religion and then every denomination within that religion swears only they have the one “truth”.  Every person has to find that road for themselves. My personal truth was empowering.  Finally being able to sort through and differentiate between my own thoughts and another person’s was refreshing.  But putting my faith in Jesus’s truth, the truth I believe holds the universe together, has changed my life.  Living my life through the lens of love, compassion, service, and peace has shown me more truth than I ever imagined possible. It gives me more than a sense of purpose, but an identity deeper than a name.

Love celebrates those truths and does not do anything to disrespect or go against those beliefs.

Love is dedicated to being a safe place for others, a light in the storm.  Love never loses hope, never stops believing in the greater good, and never takes failure as defeat.

When you see people who dedicate their lives to loving well, you see people who change the world.  

How can you love better? 

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